Hey all.. It’s good to be back after so long. Hoping that I’ll share my 2 cents more often from now.. let’s begin with today’s…
Marriage isn’t the ultimate goal of life.
A life partner shouldn’t be a need, he/she mustn’t be your only source of happiness, people expecting happiness through others end up disappointed.
We must be responsible for our own happiness and our partners can be a part of it.
Marriage shouldn’t make you dependent. Marriage should enhance your way of living not deteriorate it.
Shaadi is not limited to washing dishes, cooking, cleaning for women..and it’s not limited to earning more money, buying bigger house for men. It surely includes all of this but that’s not the purposes of shaadi.
Two people get married to LIVE with each other and their families.
Extended families should make it easier for the two of them, not make it a hell.
The concept of Shaadi is highly misunderstood in our culture.
To groom’s family it’s a means of getting new furniture, electronics, jewellery, also a maid for free… And that’s wrong.
But training the bride to be nothing but a good housemaid is EQUALLY WRONG and that’s where the issue begins..
People of the girl’s side have made a perspective that a successful marriage setting is ‘Girl being good at household chores, guy earning well, both keeping the DAMN RELATIVES happy, so that those ginti ke 16 log uder aur ginti ke 12 log ider doesn’t say anything bad about the girl or the guy’
But that’s absurd.. I will say this again.. SHAADI…THE WHOLE THING IS ABOUT TWO PEOPLE..I.E DULHA AND DULHAN.
them being happy, successful TOGETHER and the RELATIVES being A PART OF IT
they’re not supposed to be the main reason why the two of them are being married.
We’ve made fixing rishtas difficult
We’ve increased the demands for everything, starting from the guy/girl’s looks to their family background, their financial capabilities and what not.
We’ve made the ceremonies complicated, weddings can be as simple and beautiful but we make sure the food is extraordinary, the wedding hall is big and beautiful enough, the dowry material is first class and etcetera etcetera
All of this for whom?
All of this for what?
All of this for those ginti ke 28 log
Cause if a tiny bit goes wrong… “Log kya kahenge?”
Stop this nonsense
Stop pressurising girls and boys
Stop making marriages difficult
Stop entertaining dowry
Stop troubling families.. stop it!
Ab ye nai karna toh kya karna?
Understand that LOG… Kehte hi rahenge
People will keep saying.. good, bad. That shouldn’t be taken seriously. I know easier said than done but we got to start somewhere?
Only then we will be able to see the actual meaning of relations, our decisions.
And in my words,
“Shaadi is not a full stop, it’s a comma which means that neither a girl’s nor the boy’s life ends after marriage, it’s a beautiful turn which leads to a better time to be lived with a life partner.”
Normalise simpler marriages.
That will solve innumerable related issues, I promise.
If you made it till here please read some more..
I in no way mean to be rude to my relatives or any other elder in general.
I respect my relatives as much as I respect my parents
What I’m trying to say is..
Understand the youth, their likes, dislikes, when you made sure they are educated, respect their educated brains. Listen to them. Know what they want and what they don’t. Be more cooperative. Be less dominant. And stop pressurising Us🙏😭
Each of us will get married at our own respective time that is destined.
I hope positive response for this message I’m trying to convey but I’m also open for any sort of arguments (discussions). Let me know your views.